Heart without a beat
by Alaina Blackwood
Summary: Raina Blackwood has never let people see the abuse she suffered for all her life. And now after years of Black tormenting her, she might finally have to let down her walls.


p class="MsoNormal"Staring out the window, I watched the condensation fog up the glass. Letting out a sigh my companion and best friend of 5 years gave me a worried look. "Please Raina why won't you stay with me for the summer"  
She begged, unable to mask the hurt in her voice. Finally I turned to face her to have the conversation we have every year. Lily Evans, the kindest and most loving person I've ever met, with outward beauty only matched by the beauty of her soul. With sparkling emerald eyes,  
fiery red hair and a perfect slim figure it was no wonder she had caught the eye and affections of James Potter since 3suprd/sup  
year. On my first train ride to Hogwarts I'd been determined to keep my icy dissolve. If you let people in, they'll just let you down I'd learned. But Lily had easily cracked my icy walls and for the first time in my life I had felt happy. I had found a very best friend who I could depend on and brought out a lightness and happiness in me I didn't know I possessed. After being sorted into Gryffindor we quickly bonded with our roommates Marlene McKinnon and Alice Prewett. After 5 years together I consider all three my family,  
but Lily will always be my closest companion. "Lils, you know I want to, but Dumbledore said himself that I have to go back" I pleaded with her to understand. Her reply was cut off however, when the compartment door opened to reveal the infamous Marauders. I scowled knowing the only thing that could worsen my mood was to see Black's smirking face. The Marauders had become legends ever since they pulled their first prank way back at the welcoming feast in first year. James Potter, Quidditch captain, ring leader and school heart throb had everything anyone could want. He had a toned physique from quidditch over the years , wild windswept hair with bright hazel eyes behind round glasses. He seemed to be in a constant state of happiness, a smile always on his face. A natural genius,  
with two loving parents from an old wealthy pure blooded family and four best friends he considered brothers he was the envy of everyone else in the school. James really did have everything except the thing he had been pining after for years, Lily. "Alright Evans? Just thought I'd stop in the say goodbye" James grinned slinging an arm around Lily. "Potter if you don't remove your arm from me this instance I'll hex off your favourite part of your anatomy"  
She threatened with flaming cheeks. I didn't even try stifle my laughter at James' alarmed expression. "Something funny Blackwood?" My blood ran cold and I turned to see his piercing greys that oozed with intelligence and arrogance. Sirius Black. With his longish, black hair that fell effortlessly, stormy grey eyes and prominent cheek and jaw bones. Tall muscular frame he seemed to keep improving. I cursed myself for thinking that. Unlike the rest of the girls in my school I prided myself on being immune to his charms. But to be honest with myself it was all facade. "Nothing at all Black, shouldn't ye all be off terrorising some helpless student" I replied my own emotionless blue eyes meeting his. Black sneered at me before replying, " If you feel so bad for the Slytherins ,why don't you just go join their house Blackwood, You'd fit right in since your such a cold hearted bitch". Lily, Marlene and Alice all jumped up outraged "That's enough Black It's time you and Potter left" Came Lily's scathing reply. Giving Lily one last loving look Potter jumped up and left with Black, but not before the both sneered at me. All three turned to me "Don't pay attention to Potter and Black Rae their both idiots" Alice said in her gentle voice. I just shook my head letting them know it didn't bother me and continued looking out the window. My animosity with Black began right from the very start with no other reason except our clashing personalities. I couldn't stand his arrogance and he seemed to take enjoyment in finding the anger beneath my icy demeanour. We exchanged vicious taunts and scathing remarks since first year. Things had escalated in the past year though. I'd finally given up rising to his remarks and simply would reply in stony silence. This only seemed to spur him on more though. Potter had joined him on his little quest, convinced I was the reason Lily wouldn't go out with him. I'd endured their endless pranks with my usual icy demeanour never letting them see how much it affected me. I could handle the embarrassment the pain and humiliation in cause me. After what I've been through, whatever they did seemed amateur. Lily, Marlene and Alice were quick to fight back on my behalf, so I hid whatever I could from them. Lily rested her head on my shoulder and broke me out of my thoughts. The three of them spent the rest of the journey coaxing me out of my mood and into laughing and joking in a way that only they could./p 


End file.
